Today is Mother's Day in France.. in the U.S., it was a few weeks ago.. and in Costa Rica (where my step mom lives) it's on a totally different date than the two mentioned... I'm wishing all of you Mom's near and far-- a BLESSED Mom's Day... and to all of you with mom's/grandmom's/daughter's who are mom's... etc... Please love and enjoy them because when your mom is gone, this day is a hard one...
I actually broke down today and cried like a baby when the shower handle fell on my back.. I was stunned first by the pain, but then as I stood there not moving, I started BAWLING... like a 5 year old who fell off their bike and wanted their mom to come and give them a little TLC... Well, my mom's not here- and I miss her. I can't even really describe how much, because although the physical pain of missing her is no longer present within me, there is a DEEP void- a very forceful one that pulls at my heart and soul. It's very hard still, though my mom has been gone for a little over 5 years now... She was a best friend to me, an inspiration... a sweet, gorgeous, energetic, funny woman with a kind and loving heart and soul. That's what hurts so much- that she is gone, that I miss her so much and WHY did she have to be taken from me and my family from this stupid piece of SH*T cancer that knows no boundaries or limits to snatching loved ones away from you! It's just not fair...
Anyhow.. I wanted to get this out a bit here on my blog, because it's coming out- no pouring out of my heart right now as I type... I don't always get very personal here on my blog- usually it's about my mom- when a special day comes up- but I really need to get this out... I am not asking anyone for their sympathy... just for your understanding and support that you know that I'm a human being like all of you, who has a lot of emotions built up inside and that it always helps for me to talk about it with others...
Thanks for listening and for being there... because the one who is closest to me just doesn't get it... : (....
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